Before I say Sorry
by Ruell
Summary: " For once... I was wrong." Sheldon whispers, as Leonard shut the door... He was right- he has nobody.
1. Prologue

Sheldon set his messenger bag on the table, as he sat on the couch. The room felt colder than usual.

" Leonard, did you-" He looked to where Leonard would usually be, standing behind him, annoyed...but there was no one but him in the room. He turned his head away from the door,scowling. There was no way he was going to come back with his tail between his legs, begging for them to come home. After all, all Leonard was just a roommate. He was just a simple man with simple needs.

_" And you wonder why nobody wants to be around you, you're such a freak, Sheldon." His eyes shined in contempt, as the sting of his words slapped him. _

" Shut up, Leonard!" Sheldon hisses, knocking his bag over. It was Leonard who left, it was Leonard who always took offense at every little thing he had said, it was Leonard who wants to be right. It's _his _fault!

Then why is he standing outside Penny's door, waiting for Leonard to let him in?


	2. Reflection

_I'm so used to being used..._

Leonard was watching himself brushing his teeth in Penny's bathroom mirror. He noted the lipstick smudges on the sink, the basket of toiletries on the shelf... the happy ducklings shower curtains he became rather fond of-

Everything Sheldon was against.

He paused as he heard Penny softly humming in the kitchen, smiling, he rinsed his mouth out and open the door to greet his new roommate.

_" You should be grateful that you know me, Leonard. You could go places , well, not as a great of place as I... but I'm sure with you're simplistic views- you would be happy." Leonard stood in the kitchen back turned from Sheldon, making _his _breakfast, knife poised in buttering _ his _toast. _

_ " This should be _my _toast I'm buttering." He hissed quietly, while Sheldon babbled on about his ' greatness.' He didn't recall becoming a maid to a man -child, a dog to go to his master's beck and call. _

_He set down the knife ._

_" Next time you're making your own breakfast." Sheldon paused in his praises of himself, to look smugly at Leonard._

_ " Oh, we both know I'm not. You love making my food, cleaning _my _apartment, basking in _my _glory." Sheldon picked up his messenger bag, dissmissively. Without giving Leonard another glance, he left._

_Leonard glared at the door, flinging the toast Sheldon just _had_ to have. _

_ " At least eat the stuff that I made you!" He looked down in satifaction of the floored toast._

_ ' I know you're picking that up.' Sheldon's voice echoed in his mind. Leonard sighed, bending down to pick up his mess._

_Once he finds another apartment, he's leaving... at least that's what he tells himself. _

_But Sheldon knows he'll be back._

_ /_

His mother had once told him that one of God's greatest gifts, was friendship.

Then- where were these so called friends? He stood in Leo- his former roommate's room. The bed was stripped, his action figures were taken by Raj and Howard, who moved Leonard out when he left to go visit his mother. When he came back, he found the extra set of apartment keys on the kitchen counter. He remembered the weight of the keys in his hand, the jingle of them echoing in the now seemingly hollow apartment.

_Friends don't use each other, Sheldon_

_One day you'll wind up alone, and nobody will want you_

_I came with friends, you just provided shelter. _

_You wanted to be alone, well you got it._

He doesn't remember how he got there, or why.

" Come 'ere, suga," she sweetly whispered. Her ebony finger beckoned him closer. All she wore was a bathrobe, _his_ bathrobe. Howard would be proud.

_You got your wish, Sheldon._


	3. Anger

Sheldon woke up to the smell of eggs cooking in the kitchen. He was in bed, slightly confused as to what he did yesterday. He groggily got up, cleaned up in the bathroom, and made his way towards the kitchen.

" Leonard? Why are you making eggs on a Tue- oh, hello." There in the kitchen, humming, was an ebony woman, wearing what seemed to be nothing except his shirt. She turned around, with a plate of eggs, bacon, toast, and cinnamon buns. She smiled.

" Mornin', hun. You may not remember much of yesterday night. But as of today, I'm for all intents and purposes your roommate/ house wife." Sheldon stared at her, then at the plate of offered food.

" Was there alcohol involved?"

/

Leonard paced to and fro in front of his former residence, debating whether or not to go in. He had forgotten his favorite bathrobe... and he wants it back. But what to say to Sheldon? They hadn't really spoken in awhile, nor had they seen each other. Neither has Raj and Howard.

_ " Hey, Sheldon, I forgot my bathrobe... can you get it?" _

Or

_" Sheldon, I left my bathrobe in the bathroom, and I'm going to get it."_

He sighed, Sheldon was going to be hateful either way. He knocked on the door, and waited.

" Leonard." Curt reply, no question. Sheldon's looming figure looked down, nonchalant.

" I left my bathrobe in the bathroom." Sheldon stared at him a little longer, as if he was debating whether or not to shut the door in his face. Maybe, thought Leonard, he would actually get it.

Sheldon stepped back.

" -Then by all means do come in and get it." Leonard stiffly walked in. The place looks the same- as it should be, seeing how Sheldon doesn't like change. It felt awkward, like he was a stranger in this abode.

But he was.

Sheldon went back to his laptop, disinterested as usual.

_You should be glad you know me_

" You know what, Sheldon? While I'm here, I'm going to tell you what's what. You know why I left?" Sheldon continued to type, not even going to look at him.

" You are tired of me, as everyone always do. Are you done? Because I'm working, and I don't need a harpy." Leonard glared at the laptop that took his attention from him.

"... Yes, Sheldon. You don't just disregard everyone just because you're slightly smarter than everyone else."

" Slightly?"

" Yes, slightly." Sheldon stood up, spinning hotly toward Leonard.

" You know what's slightly? Trying to figure out how to blend into society. It's hard to find a place in this world, Leonard, without being labled a freak. Do you know how many times I had to ingore those little jabs you, Raj, and Howard seem to think goes over my head. So, forgive me, if all I had to learn from was the neigborhood kids etching into my memory what humans did to people that were different. Pardon my actions, when you at least had enough charisma to make up for your loneliness to gain friends, lovers, and staying on friendly terms with others. Whereas, I had to accept that the only things I was useful for, and used for was my genius and humiliation..." His eyes shined in anger.

" Not even my siblings protected me..." He pointed a finger in Leonard's direction, which in turn made Leonard back up.

" Don't you _ever _call me anything ' slightly' again." He growled. Leonard stood his ground.

" Be that as it may, it doesn't excuse you from your adult actions. That was then, this is now. _You had _friends, Sheldon." The fierce look in Sheldon's eyes quieted Leonard's speech.

" Yeah, I had a friend. It was you. Howard and Raj are your friends, not mine. As you can see where their loyalty lies, based on how fast they readily dropped me." Leonard was about to reply, when a feminine cough distracted them.

" Am I interrupting?" The woman was dressed in a simple blouse and pencil skirt, feet bare.

" Uh..." Leonard stuttered, as Sheldon stalked to the door, opening it up."

" No, he was just leaving. Good day, Leonard."

_'All he wanted was his robe...'_

He nodded at Sheldon, then the woman, exiting the residence.

Sheldon quietly shut the door.

_I'm better off alone..._

He glanced back at the short man that was his roommate, walk back into Penny's apartment.

_Then why do I want him back?_

_Sherlock was right, love is a weakness on the losing side._


	4. New Addition

Sheldon didn't ask when she was leaving, didn't even comment on why she decided she was to make herself at home in his apartment. He just let her coach him like a dog. He's been in his own Mind Palace, staring through the world in a haze. Ever since his and Leonard's argument, he's been somewhat emotionally compromised. He will not call his mother for his troubles, no, he is to solve this on his own.

" Sheldon." He turned from his laptop back to his new roommate. She was preparing lunch, but set the supplies down with a sigh.

" Get some clothes on, we're going out."

/

Sheldon stared out the window of the restaurant. He didnt know why she dragged him here. It was one of the newer places his former friends frequent. But here they were, she gussied up, looking like they were at a five star restaurant, while he was in his usual disinterested garb. She, he noted, was studying the room- as if she could scout the area for people she or he definitely didn't want to see.

" Sheldon," She began, candy apple lips tilted in a thoughtful manner. "- the reason why we're here, is because your quest to make amends with your friends has gone stale. Don't tell me you don't care, cause you do. And in the brief time we have met, your actions suggest more than what your pride says." Her bracelets chimed softly, as her hand dug through her purse. " Here we go." She had pulled out a square box, and Sheldon could guess what held inside it.

" My name is Noelle Reeve, I am a relationship specialist in training. I happen to be acquainted with you awhile back. I believe at a Comic Con, which is why I try to imitate Nyota Uhura's style. You are a great man, whether or not you believe it. You miss your friends, right?"

"...Yes." Came the soft answer.

" Good, then trust me." She slid the box over to him, eyes focused on the window.

" Because I've found a way to get your friends back."

/

He barely knew this woman, he literally picked her off the street corner. But, seeing Leonard and his crew coming in their direction for a table, he quickly opened the box, got down on one knee.

" Noelle, would you marry me?"

He heard Raj gasp, as Noelle reached for the ring.

" Yes, Sheldon." She slipped the ring on, as Sheldon embraced her. He could feel their eyes, along with everyone elses eyes on them. He pulled back, smiling at her, leaning in, kissing her as covincingly as he could.

/

Sheldon kept giving her knowing glances, as they ate their lunch. His friends were alternating from peeking at them, to whispering amongst themselves. They got a complimentary meal from management, along with a bottle of wine.

" So- we are engaged?"

" Yes.'

" What's the plan?"

" Your soon-to-be- friends' curiosity will be stroked, which will have them coming into ' our' apartment, asking questions. Since our engagement is the only thing that will get them to talk to you. We will keep this charade up, until you have reconciled with them. Then we will break up, which will have you back in their graces." Sheldon took a sip of his soda.

_But I don't want their pity._

Sheldon tilted his head, angling so, so he could see Leonard's face in the glass's reflection.

_ 'Friends don't use each other, Sheldon'_

_ 'If you mean it, say it'_

_I'm sorry, Leonard._

Now, if only he could say it.

/

Leonard set his jacket across Penny's couch.

" So that was an interesting discovery..." Howard mumbled, stupidly. Leonard sat on the couch, staring at the table.

" Sheldon found a girl, so what? We aren't exactly on speaking terms with him. When was the last time we talked to him? A month ago?"

" Sheldon's engaged, Raj. Even if we weren't speaking, I thought that he would at least _hint _that he wanted to propose to a girl who I, we, didn't even get to meet. He always comes to me with his problems. Always."

" Um, guys? Not only is he engaged- but he is also living with her."

Leonard stalked over toward the peephole. And there they were. Her stuff, her things, _trinkets_ littered their apartment. They looked happy, embracing each other with the door open, not a care in the world. They are happy... _Sheldon is _happy.

_Without me_

"Guys- we're going to visit Sheldon, tomorrow."


End file.
